Not Yet

On Super Bowl Sunday, two years ago, Brett and I found out that we were having another baby.

Super exciting. Super scary. Super surprise.

What ensued in the weeks ahead was a lot of soul searching by two scared parents. I knew I wanted something different for our family. Needed something different actually. It was then that Brett and I decided to pursue the option of moving back to Washington, PA - a much smaller town and the place where I grew up. I must take a moment to give Brett a lot of credit here because at this point in our decision there was nothing for me to do. He took it upon himself to acquire his PA law license and eventually his WV license to make himself more marketable. The unfortunate part of all of his hard work was that any job out there didn't change a whole lot about what our life would look like. We couldn't escape a long commute and city "living". In October 2014, with the help of some people that had been "at it" much longer than Brett, he decided to open his own law firm. The Friday night he returned from his WV swearing in, we sat for a long time while he laid out this plan. My initial reaction was obvious - that while this seemed exciting it wasn't something we would not actually consider. The more we talked and the more excitement that I saw in him about this decision, I knew this was it. We had prayed for so long that an opportunity would come. We felt like all we were being told was no. What I came to realize was this was all part of the plan. God hadn't been telling us no, he had been telling us not yet because something bigger and better was on the horizon. Fast forward to today, our family is in the midst of some major changes. Brett is all in, starting his own law firm in small town Washington, PA while I tie up loose ends here and finish out the school year. It' not ideal and it's not exactly how we saw things working out, but again God is simply asking us to be patient and put our faith in him that this is exactly how things are supposed to be.

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Making the best of what isn't

I recently came across this quote:

Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain.

When I say that my family and I are blessed, I believe it with all my heart. But that doesn't mean that things are perfect, far from it actually. For a while now, there have have been "things" that Brett and I have wanted, changes we have wanted to make, and things we wanted to do differently. Some of those "things" have come to fruition and some of them haven't. It's frustrating. Sometimes it just seems as though life isn't what you want it to be and it's easy to get caught up in what isn't and forget about what is. Be it family, friends, jobs, time, money, whatever, I firmly believe that God has a plan in mind, but I have to be honest, there are times I disagree with his plan or don't understand it.

One of the biggest "things" that I have wanted is to be able to be at home with our boys. After Declan was born, I was supposed to go back to work in January, but knew very quickly that I didn't think I could do it. Well, I knew I could do it, I just knew I didn't want to. Brett quickly figured a way for us to make it work and because of him working so hard each and every day I got to stay home and watch our boys grow into brothers for 10 whole months. That is pretty amazing! Unfortunately, that time has come to an end and I will be going back to work soon. This is part of the plan that I disagree with and don't understand, in case You are reading. I never thought I would want to be a stay at home mom and I could have never imagined loving it as much as I do.

Going back to work is not the only thing that doesn't seem to be working out like we intended. We have been living in what seems like a temporary state for a while waiting for a change. It has frustrated us and got us down. There have been days that I don't think we enjoyed to the fullest because we wished things were different. I regret that.That quote I mentioned at the beginning spoke to me. It was like a slap in the face that whether things are up or down, this is the life we are given and it is up to us to revel in its beauty each and every day even if that means making the best of a situation that we wish was different. I know this post has been vague because many of the "things" that Brett ave been hoping and praying for personal, but the message is universal. It's time to stop wishing for what isn't and enjoying what is. Because "what is" is really pretty special!

God Bless Owen!

Sunday was a very special day for Owen - he was baptized! He was very fortunate to be surrounded by family and friends on a perfect summer day while he was welcome into the church.

During th actual baptism, he was so content. he only cried at the very end, probably because the water was so cold. 

Brett and I feel blessed to have Natalie and Mark in our life. We know that Owen is equally blessed tot have them as his Godparents. They are sure to be a special part in Owen's life!

Owen was given a special white cloth made by the ladies of the church. He looked adorable in Brett's baptism outfit. He also wore a special pin with a medal on it that was worn by both my mom and myself at our own baptisms.  

"Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart."

Ash Wednesday

Brett and I woke up early this morning so that we could make it to mass before work rather than wait until late tonight and not make it to the gym. What a wonderful way to start the day! For some reason, I have always really liked Lent even though it involves (or should involve) great sacrifice. I guess it is a lovely way of looking forward to Spring and new beginnings. This year, as I have for the past several, I will be giving up coffee. I have also decided that there are a few things I want to "work on" during Lent, those being - going to church on a regular basis, going to Confession, and not swearing. Brett is giving up alcohol! I know! So, I think we are both on the right track, although I am sure we will have our slip ups, what a great way to make a small sacrifice to God, who has blessed us with so many wonderful people and things!

Funny story: we listened to the gospel this morning from Matthew who spoke of silent almsgivings, not letting the right hand know what the left is doing, praying in silent and not having to broadcast it, and basically doing good for the sake of good and not for the reward. Brett leaned over with his big black ash cross and said "Doesn't this cross on my forehead make it difficult to not tell people I went to church this morning?":-)

Sundays...it doesn't get any better than this!

Sundays are our favorite day of the week. Whether it is getting ready for a day of football, working out in the yard or just enjoying each others company, Sundays have always meant something to us. I think it has something to do with when we were living 8 hours apart and Sunday was always the last day we head before heading our separate ways. Yesterday we had the most pleasant day. We slept in a bit and then ate breakfast. One thing I love about out house is the way the morning light shines through the big window upstairs right into the dining room. It sets the perfect tone for sipping coffee and reading the paper. We lingered for a little too long and laughed at the dogs sitting our laps and in their own chairs. Brett left and went to Lowe's and I did some grocery shopping. Ironically we pulled back into the driveway at the exact same time. After working a bit around the house, we had a snack (healthy of course), and took the dogs for along walk. Everything is still melted and mess! Needless to say we ended up bathing both dogs together in the bathtub. We ate a wonderful dinner of pot roast, carrots and potatoes and finished the night doing out taxes. May sound dull, but it was one of the best days I have had in while.

Perhaps this should be a different post, but I am associating my wonderful Sunday with Brett with the reading I did at church on Saturday evening. It was form the book of Job and our priest said the most wonderful homily. He spoke of the story of Job and related it to people living right now and struggling with the economy. So often we ask "Why Me?" when something bad happens. Job asks God this question but he does not answer. Eventually Job realized he needs to have faith in God because God has a plan. Brett and I have been struggling with talks of selling our house and ways to save money, etc. I get bogged done by what we don't have and what we want, but on Sunday I managed for an entire day, to step back and be so thankful for what I have in my life and it turned out to be the perfect day!