Owen turned 3 months yesterday (post coming soon...the little stinker wasn't cooperating for his photo shoot), which means I have officially been off work for 3 months and a few days (remember that baby free maternity leave that was cut short by having a baby?) and as of Monday have exactly 12 weeks to go. Yep - the new school year starts on Monday and thus begins the countdown to me return to the "real" world. The world of getting up early (even earlier than I do now), taking a shower (not at 3:00), getting dressed (in something other than running shorts (if only it was to run in) and a t-shirt), and getting out the door (not to Target). *sigh*
Before Owen was born, this phrase passed my lips on more than one occasion - "I could never be a stay at home mom. I don't know what I would do all day." Well, part of that is true - on most days I look back and am not sure what I did all day - but the other part was me being naive. I could TOTALLY be a stay at home mom. I absolutely adore it and think that there is no other job in the world that compares to raising our son. It makes me sad to think that come November, someone else will be the one to wipe his butt, clean up his spit up, and hear the ear piercing cry when he is beyond hungry. To many people, that may not sound like fun but I consider it a privilege to do these things every day. It is things like this morning, when I walked up to his crib and he smiled at me, lifted both legs, rolled to his side, and farted that makes me proud to be the Mommy of this sweet little boy. Why would I consider that a privilege? Well, it's easy to love on a baby when they are happy and smiling, but it's a little more work when you are wrangling this baby and his new found love of kicking his feet in his poopy diaper. But I am the one who gets to do it. I am the one who gets handed the baby in a group of people when he starts to fuss. I like being "the one". I guess that may not make sense to everyone.
A lot of people's response to this post would be that anything is possible and that if I really wanted to stay home, that we could make it work. That's true. But, we have made a decision that we feel is best for our family (at least for now) to continue working. Being a 2 income family allows us to do things we would not otherwise be able to do if I didn't work. This may sound silly, but I can't wait to take Owen to Disney World and that trip would be a lot farther off if I didn't work. Also, being a teacher gives me a schedule that most mom's would drool over. I get to work decent hours, have every night, weekend, and holiday off and get several weeks throughout the year and summer break to look forward to. It really is a win-win situation.
As for Owen, I know that Brett and I are the best people to raise him. On the other hand, going to a sitter allows his world to be a little bigger. It allows him to learn life skills like sharing and will help him to understand that the world is a bigger place than just him and his home. I want him to know these things. I want him to be a patient and kind young man and I truly believe that some time away from us and with other people can teach him these things better than we can. Part of this might be me convincing myself of these things, but one thing is for sure - I want the best or our son!